Escaping reality and being empathic

 

It is about 2-3 weeks my mid semester exams are over, now everything is going on calmly, with no extraneous pressures. But the week of mid semester exams was quite an enervating week, we had exam every other day, but it had moments which shone some light on some really important facts.

Every person in this world wants a better reality than the one that they possess!

It was the day before my penultimate exam. I had just awoken from a nap, and just began studying the notes. But somehow nothing was getting inside my head. I was scared, so I called my friend and asked him if it would be OK if I come over his room and we could study together. He agreed, and I was happy by it. In about 15 minutes, I was at his room in his hostel. We started studying the notes together and it began quite fruitfully. Our conversation as we revised took a different turn. They turned from me asking my friend doubts to us talking and comparing room sizes and roommates. I was surprised to know that we faced similar problems. As hours went by, I got acquitted with his room, surroundings and hostel in general. My mind unconsciously compared my room to his, it started finding shortcomings and problems with my room. I grew familiar with his surrounding, and after spending about 7 hours in his room, my mind started accepting his room as my own. Suddenly, my mind fronded at the fact that I HAD to return to my room again. My mind started finding comfort in someone else’s surrounding, somehow it found comfort in the idea of escaping the reality I faced. I was happy to tell him that I could exchange his room for mine, if it was fine for him. Moreover, I knew that he too liked my room, and would be more than happy to exchange. But now my mind shrieked, “BEING EMPATHETIC IS FINE, BUT ESCAPING REALITY ISN’T”.

After about 1 week after my exam got over, I went home. This time I went home after about 2.5 months. I was excited at the same time really happy to taste home food after a long time. After coming back, I cycled, played my piano, and watched a couple of movies. The night before my flight back to Delhi, I couldn’t sleep, I was restless. I couldn’t believe my senses that I had to go back, and the whole week had gone in a blink. My mind comforted in the idea of staying at home, it found happiness in escaping reality than facing it.

Coming back to the university was difficult, I was feeling homesick and tired. As the week started, I again began the routine of cycling to classes, and back. My university cycle was not as awesome as my home cycle. There was a periodic sound coming from around the pedals of the cycle. The air pressure in my tyres was low. Out of the blue, I thought my home cycle. It never had any problems, it rode smoothly. But this cycle well it was officious. I had an epiphany, I faced a similar situation during exams. I was NOT accepting reality, I was trying to escape it. I was balancing pros and cons, and making comparisons.

Somehow the world that I know of lacks empathy. The people of this world are increasingly narcissistic, and are completely imperturbable to another person’s lifestyle. But there is an irony here. We are ready to trade and exchange for a better life, we are ready to escape a harsh reality for a reality which is much more comfortable and better. We are ready to wear somebody else’s shoes if they are grander, shinier and comfortable than our own. The concept of empathy and escaping reality are facets of the same coin. We are not emphatic, but we are ready to accept a better reality than our own. This particular aspect makes our life difficult, we are not comfortable in our own skin. Due to this, we don’t experience and feel things the way we should. Only when we accept the things that we face, only then can we really enjoy the life that we have.

The Fall

A few days ago, I had gone out for a vacation, that’s why there was no post for a couple of days. But this short vacation that I went on, was quite inspirational and insightful.

The place that I visited in my vacation was a hill station in Gujarat, India. It is about 1000 meters from the sea level. Like any other hill station, it has lush greenery and a mountainous landscape. There were many tourist points, and the one that instigated me to think, was the Table land. It is plateau on top of hill, where you can do a number of things- that are quite missing in an urban life, like riding a horse, etc. This plateau is surrounded by declines and ascends of land, which appear like folds on a crumpled bed sheet. The day I visited this amazing landscape, I was quite ebullient and excited. With that rabid enthusiasm running through my veils, I tried to climb a dangerous high point on this ironically flat land. My mom and dad watched me from a distance; they were keenly observing me with a particular shrewdness a parent watches. And at that point, I SLIPPED; luckily I was able to hold on to the safety railings. By seeing me almost fall down from a steep point, my parents were furious, but there is where the insightful moment lies.

Zenith Point on the table land

As I tightly held onto the guard rails, almost coming too close dangerous to the point that I almost went tumbling down from the zenith point, my dad looked at me, and gave me an uneasy smile, and he said,” A man in his life has to answer 2 principal questions- one is what is his role in this world? And what is his fate rather he should have the ability to recognize and acknowledge his fate. And you young man, are not properly answering these 2 questions and delving into completely unknown territories!” Well my dad was quite implicit in what he said, his underlining message was quite clear- Be careful, but he unknowingly triggered in my mind a series of thoughts about this mysterious concept- fate and its recognition in your life. These 2 questions are the main basis on which the heavy metal legends Iron Maiden compose their melodies rather a more appropriate word would be anthems. These songs are enigmatic, and get me thinking each time I listen to them. Similarly, what my dad said was a general truth. These 2 questions have to be answered by each and every person born on this planet. But the thing that really got me thinking was predetermination of fate and rigidity of the future. The general truths posit that fate and future is rigid, stubborn, and unchangeable. These 2 things cannot be altered or changed.

A memorable quote from Terminator 2

At this point, I beg to differ. I don’t think this is the case after all. Our actions have consequences, and as we progress in this ’brave new world’, our choices determine the path of our fate. This reminds me of my personal favorite and world-renowned Sci-Fi movie series- Terminator. The theme of this series deals with the inevitability of the future, and how the characters- Sarah Connor, John Connor, Terminator try to alter this inevitability. It also deals with the dilemma one faces when one has to take responsibility of his/her fate. In this world, we too go about in a similar way, we struggle with fate, with our future not consciously but our choices underline this aspect. This reminds me of another saying-

“What goes around, comes around”

This truth is also based on the fact that the future and our fate are changeable, and that our actions we take in this world are consequential.

I guess in our life, we struggle with these 2 choices- one is where we have to accept what fate has to offer to us, and the other is where we have to make our own fate.

I was surprised that this unfortunate fall would turn out to be so philosophical and insightful.

Song Chronicle: This Velvet Glove

It has being a long time since I written my earliest type of article the song chronicles, it will be the first time I will publish this type of article on my new blog. This time the song that has taken some considerable time in my life is this velvet glove, it starts off on a rather interesting guitar piece, and the feel of the song is a little spiritual rather i should say philosophical.

One of the most difficult thing in our life is to live in the present, it is an irony that it should be a difficult thing but it is so. We either are lost in the thoughts about our future or past. Well the same thing happened to me too, a few years ago as well as a few days back I was a bit lost in the memory lane of my dark past, this song did take my breath away and it made me figure this song out on my beloved piano. As I was saying my past is a little ‘close to my skin’ even though it is not so memorable. I’m trying really hard to move on rather I’m still to trying to settle in my present(Sittin’ by the phone I’m left alone In another zone)it is not so easy to do that(someone who has been I’m falling in). People suggest me that it is better to move on and not dwell on my past but enjoy the moment after all it is not an easy task(John says to live above hell My will is well). During some times in my life, there have been instances when I thought that people were just expecting me to fail, but these present times are not that times, the present life that I have being the best days of my life, there is a saying that old habits don’t die so easily so I think it is an old habit that might be lingering behind that has being troubling me(no one is waiting for me to fail my will could sail)

After reading all this you might just feel that all that I’m doing is that I’m wasting my precious time thinking about the past and speculating that the past does not repeat itself in the future. But I believe that past is something that you should carry with yourself and it should be a source of your inspiration for living your present life. At times I feel that my past is just another best friend I have in my life who has being with me through thick and thin, but at the same time I feel that this guy has just over stayed his life, and now whenever an opportunity prevails for him to come up he comes up eagerly and tell me his dream(I want to taste the taste of Being face to face with common grace To meditate on the warmest dream And when I walk alone I listen To our secret theme). He tells me that his dream is to see you on the top of this world, I want to see you succeed in life. Even though my past is just a thought the lyrics of the song tell me the truth and it makes me imagine my past as a friend.

Some dreams of your past and your present are one and the same thing…

As I look into his(the past) eyes, they are clear unfortunately they are filled with hate for this world, besides this these eyes are so clear that you can see through him feel what he feels, they speak the truth. The truth behind the fact that even though I might have moved on from the past, he will follow me into the future and he will dictate me what I should do in my life. The real deal is to choose between two things the dream of my past or the dream of my present(Your solar eyes are like Nothing I have ever seen Somebody close That can see right through I’d take a fall and you know That I’d do anything I will for you).

The Chorus, maybe one of the most powerful and energetic chorus I ever listened to                                            

One of the most powerful lyrics I have ever heard

As I move on with my life,  I work for my future a bright future, well everyone works like that not just me.(Sailin’ for the sun ‘Cause There is one Knows where I’m from I care for you I really do I really do).One thing I want to showcase this world is that I’m what I’m in the present and not what has become of me because of my past. It is one of the difficult things to do, rather it is one of the few things I’m struggling with in my present. But as I try to move on and start believing that the past doesn’t define you but the good things that happen in my life define you, my dreaded and dear friend the past returns, he comes up  because I unintentionally called him back.( Come closer now So you can lie Right by my side Sit alone in the sun I wrote a letter to you Getting over myself)

This  time I tell him the truth that I have finally moved on and I don’t need you anymore besides this he again remind me of ‘our secret theme’. As you unintentionally think about your past and thing about the time you have moved on from it, you will observe a pattern a pattern regarding how your life turned out after you moved, this pattern tells you that the truth that you found it hard to believe earlier- the past does not repeat itself. The thing that happen to you in your life is the most unlikely ways are not among the signs that the past is going, but they are an indication that such things are a part and parcel of the real world affecting you. You will realize that disaster or rather I should say that the unlikely events that happen in your life is the real world’s way of making you stronger and cleverer for facing it boldly and not running away from it(Disasters are Just another star Falling in my yard John says to live above hell My will is well). The bitter irony you shall see from this is that the past from which you are trying to move away from, will eventually catch up with your present self, and it will make you realize one of the strangest things in life- the joy that you get from running from it is less than the happiness you acquire when you hold onto your dreaded friend the past(Long to be with Someone to tell I love your smell). It painstakingly tell you that you will eventually succeed in your life and that you can never get rid of me in your life because I’m (the past) just a part of you.

You can listen to this song through this youtube link:

The links of images: Tumblr